Are You Looking At My Soul?

The eye doctor told me that I need trifocals.

I’m pretty sure when he said that my eyes crossed in confusion. What in the world are trifocals? I’d heard of bifocals but never trifocals.

When he started explaining that they are glasses that have different parts of the lens that I would look through for far away distances, medium distances, and then short distances, I almost laughed because surely he most be joking. He wasn’t.

I instantly thought to myself, “Wow! I am an old granny.”  

I should have known something like that was coming when I started shouting random letters during the eye exam. Have you ever taken one of those tests? It is hard. I knew I was in trouble by the time I was tempted to sing ”E-I-E-I-O.”

The eye exam test isn’t like the SAT you take in high school- where you can just make lightning bolts designs with all the circles you fill in. No, this test puts you on the spot.

You and you alone have to come up with the letters to say. You alone have to remember to breathe when the doctor is so ridiculously close to your face you wonder along with Brian Regan if he is in fact looking at your soul. At least this time I could take comfort in the fact that I brought a Tic-Tac.  

I made it out of that eye exam with dilated eyes and a prescription for eyeglasses that might have me tripping over my own feet for a month. But I think I’ll be ok once I figure out where to look in the trifocals. Honestly I’m just glad to be able to see, and I’m happy that my lens aren’t as thick as an ice-cube.

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